Keep Playing - I

This thought had come to me sometime back, when I was trying to figure out what has been the most benevolent governmental move in the recent years. I have been trying to figure the same out for sometime, browsing through reams and reams of internet pages. I had originally thought that there could be nothing more important and more fulfilling than empowerment of the masses who are little less fortunate than we are. That could be on the basic requirements of life in terms of food, clothing, shelter, education, a right to a decent and respectable livelihood. And having done so – this is what I present as the most radical, free of all contrive – a sure move towards logical empowerment. I present – the PLAYBOY, in Braille, subsidized by the Government of the United States of America.

“Most likely you are surprised that such a thing exists. You are not alone.

When I discovered Playboy in Braille years ago, it was in a box in an abandoned building. I found myself in a state of disbelief. The kind you feel when you're being chased by a leprechaun with a crossbow.

It's normal to not want Playboy in Braille to exist. Because it's weird. It raises too many questions. Questions like: Why is the government printing Playboy in Braille? And: How do you explain a naked woman to a pubescent, visually impaired teen?

"Elka leans against a wall, wearing only a carpenter's tool belt. She's hot. Believe me." "Katsumi arches unnaturally over a coffee table. You can see the whole thing."
"Anja's Mediterranean skin is a warm brown, like the craft paper Playboy you're reading with your finger."

Playboy in Braille makes you think. It's exciting but uncomfortable at the same time.
Like Courtney Love fixing your stove.

Run your fingers over the pages, never really knowing if you're touching a gorgeous blonde or an essay by Tom Clancy. Was that Cindy Crawford's bum, or an interview with Gore Vidal? Frankly, it's whatever you want it to be.

...This would be a terrible gift for the visually impaired, because you don't give the visually impaired one quarter of a decade-old Playboy as a gift.

But for you? Put it out on the coffee table like I did. Owning Playboy in Braille is like having a Day-Glo orange monkey that can curse in Farsi. It gets attention. People talk.

You want Playboy in Braille. Playboy in Braille wants you.

At least that's what I think it says.” [Citation]

As early as in December 1985, in a blatant move towards moral policing, the social purging authorities at the Library of Congress had recommended that productions be ceased. In a landmark ruling, a Federal District judge, sympathizing with this exigency for empowerment of the visually impaired ruled that the First Amendment rights of the blinds have been compromised with by eliminating Braille editions of the Playboy.

I always knew I was right.