Wonder-Fool

The previous few years had seen certain changes in my life, especially pertaining to my mail and connected world. Around everyday, I have received one mail, text or scrap which has asked, requested or ordered me to vote for the Taj Mahal so that it could qualify as one of the new 7 wonders of the world. And all that came to an end at Lisbon, Portugal on 7th July, 2007 or 07-07-07 when Bipasha Basu in the presence of Ben Kingsley and Hillary Swank heralded to the world, the Taj as one of the wonders. Call it destiny or sheer coincidence, everyone on the stage had an Indian connection, Bipasha Basu by her roots and Ben Kingsley vide Gandhi.

The point here is obviously not about that and the attachments that one have about the Taj as an Indian emblem, neither as it being a witness to historical moments from Aurangzeb meting out imprisonment to Shah Jahan to the drama of chalice and contempt in the Atal Vihari Bajpayee – Musharraf summit. This is supposed to be as trifle an issue as votes, an attempts to make even a list of architectural wonders a captive of democratic world order. We have already made a farce from hung parliaments to talent hunts. Heres one more to the list!

I was having a discussion with a friend of mine from the information technology industry, who claims to have as much knowledge about the IT industry as Salman Khan in a shirt understands acting. And even by his standards, the number of votes seems to be quite low. Think about it, that for the last three years, almost every person with an email id has been bombarded with the campaign to vote. A R Rehman blared, TV channels crooned, T shirts, underwears, the wonders were everywhere. And the total votes cast were close to 100 million, close to India’s population. Even if we had a reiterative program to keep on casting votes, that number would have gone in a jiffy. Believe me there have been people who have tried them and quite successfully. Ask previous year's talent show winners for a start.

Which brings me to my moot question. Is it that every country has lost pride for their respective architectural wonders? The original wonders started with the seven wonders of the ancient world from Hellenic sight seers followed by the seven wonders of the middle ages. Howard Hilman for the first time segregated his man made travel wonders, natural wonders. And from there on there has been umpteen number of such lists, depending on different criteria. Hilman said Serengeti Migration should qualify as a natural wonder. Critics differed saying, that’s not a wonder, that’s an event. From here on people just did not care.

This was more like the investment banking profession I am in. Investment banks rate themselves by something called league table in which they are rated by the number and value of deals they complete in a particular type of offering like say IPOs, M&A etc. So to proclaim himself as the numero uno banker of his times, a banker would go to any lengths and to such ludicrous levels that I have been the #1 banker in issuance of FCCBs without a credit linked note from 11.37 pm on 28th of August till 12.23 am on 3rd of September. If you have not understood anything do not even bother to re-read it!

The American Society of Civil Engineers came up with list of modern world wonders and even as recent as in 2006 USA Today, the publication known to rate and rank US universities to brothels along with the American television show “Good Morning America” came up with a list of eight wonders, with seven wonders being chosen by a panel of six judges and the eighth world being a viewer’s choice.

This was not enough. In 2001, the New Open World Corporation, headed by Mr. Webber, the person who claimed instant fame by the launch of his amphibian vehicle at the Sydney Opera Harbor a week before the Sydney Olympics, announced an initiative to chose the seven new wonders by a consensus of people. And so started net and text campaigns. Very soon UNESCO withdrew their blessings over this endeavor.

And there is more. There were corruption and collusion all around. For instance, one day, I was walking around the dusty roads in interior Punjab and at a tea stall found a rustic looking middle aged man with a Taj T shirt. Soon I started an animated discussion with him on this issue. “Sahib”, he said, “we should vote and that too in large numbers. You know these Pakistanis can do anything for their F-16s. They have started voting for the Statute of Liberty to appease that Bushy president. Meine pata kiya hai. Kuch logon ko to meine kaha tha Taj ke liye vote karne. (I had tried to find out. I had asked some people there to vote myself for the Taj).” "Bhaiyya ek glass pani dena please," was my response.

And if you felt you have had enough, hold on. The New Open World Corporation has come up with a new competition on the blocks called “The Seven Natural Wonders of the World“. Nominations are being invited right now and the results would come out on 08/08/2008. Last time around I was one of those blasphemous people who did not vote for the Taj but this time around I would surely do, for the filth, dirt, acid, acrimony, and disease around the Taj amidst which the Taj stands resplendent on a full moon night. Ye kudrat ka den nahi to aur kya!